Post by Dr Fogg on Jul 8, 2009 17:56:52 GMT -5
(To be read using a Yorkshire accent, if you don’t know what that is then just do your best)
Free Danny.
Now Danny, my Jack Russell Terrier
Were sleeping in’t garden by house
A few bees were a’ buzzin around him
And now and again the odd mouse.
But his ears pricked up when he heard a Ta do
Coming from Mr. Jones’s farm
The sheep were blarting in terror
And a barking noise raised the alarm.
Danny jumped over the garden gate
Ran down the lane and turned right
He crawled under t’ gate to the sheep field
To see such a terrible sight.
Two big black dogs were attacking
Mr. Jones’s prize Suffolk sheep
There was blood and wool almost everywhere
Danny gave one giant leap.
He confronted the dogs very bravely
And bit them as best as he could
They were bigger than him and quite nasty
But he did what a Jack Russell should.
Poor Danny lay on the ground bleeding
But at least the big dogs had fled.
He crawled to the gate in a terrible state
“What’s going on ere” a voice said.
Farmer Jones grabbed little Danny
And he shook him so hard, Danny cried.
“Attack my sheep would you” he bellowed
“Its jail for you, the judge can decide”.
The news soon reached me (I’m Alice)
It reached my mum and dad too
“Dad they’ve locked him in jail” I said
What are we going to do”?
“Calm down” said dad “we need cool heads
And the best lawyer that we can afford”
So he got on the phone and called one
By the name of Mr. Sideboard.
Then they drove into town to see Danny
In the jail of the magistrates courts
He lay there covered in bandages
Mother said “By gum, he looks out of sorts”
The jailor let Alice go into the cell
When he saw her, he wagged his tail
Alice told him “Don’t worry
Our lawyer is not going to fail”.
Next day it were in the papers
With a picture of Danny too
Mad dog kills sheep were the headline
Full story will be on page two.
They entered the office of Mr. Sideboard
He had carpets would you believe
“Now then Mr. Entwistle (that’s our surname)
What’s to do I cannot conceive!”
“Your Danny is obviously guilty
He had blood on his mouth and paws
I shall plead with judge for mercy
But I doubt if we’ll get it of course”.
“There’s only one possible sentence
In cases like this I’m afraid
That’s for Danny to be hung till he’s dead
You best be sorting his grave”.
Then summat append that were quite amazing
My dad stood up strong and tall
“Mr. Sideboard, our Danny is Innocent
And you sir know bugger all.”
We marched right out of the office
And I stuck me tongue out at him
My dad shouted “we’ll defend Danny
And if you send us a bill, it’ll go in the bin”.
The Judge looked over his glasses
“Next case” he quickly did say
The Usher called “Bring Danny Entwisle
He’s vicious so keep well away.”
Danny were to small for the dock
So a policeman held him up high
The policeman looked at Danny
Danny licked him right in one eye.
The first witness were farmer Jones
And he said just what he saw
And than they asked me dad
If he wanted to say any more.
Me father stood up real proud like
And he said “This case is most grave
For an innocent dog is before you”
Then he gave our Dan a quick wave.
“I have statements from hundreds of people
Saying Danny has a fine temperament
One of them from Danny’s vet
Which he most kindly sent”.
But the Judge put his black cap on
“You’re a vicious killer” he said
“You’ll be taken from here in the morning
And hung by your neck until dead”.
“I cried NO please save my Danny”
My father pleaded as well
Our Danny just let out a whimper
As they took him back to his cell.
Just then the court door burst open
It were Jimmy our dustman with red face
“Stop stop” he shouted real loud like
“I’ve new evidence in this terrible case”.
The judge thought it mighty irregular
But he swore the Dustman in
He told of the morning in question
And how he’d been emptying a bin.
He had seen the two dogs in question
And the terrible deed they had done
How Danny had fought hard to stop them
And stop them he did by gum.
The Judge banged his gavel quite loudly
And shouted “This case is dismissed”
The crowd went wild with cheering
We jumped up and down and kissed.
Now Danny is back home, a hero
Asleep in our yard once more
Surrounded by bones from well wishers
And cards on his kennel door.
Free Danny.
Now Danny, my Jack Russell Terrier
Were sleeping in’t garden by house
A few bees were a’ buzzin around him
And now and again the odd mouse.
But his ears pricked up when he heard a Ta do
Coming from Mr. Jones’s farm
The sheep were blarting in terror
And a barking noise raised the alarm.
Danny jumped over the garden gate
Ran down the lane and turned right
He crawled under t’ gate to the sheep field
To see such a terrible sight.
Two big black dogs were attacking
Mr. Jones’s prize Suffolk sheep
There was blood and wool almost everywhere
Danny gave one giant leap.
He confronted the dogs very bravely
And bit them as best as he could
They were bigger than him and quite nasty
But he did what a Jack Russell should.
Poor Danny lay on the ground bleeding
But at least the big dogs had fled.
He crawled to the gate in a terrible state
“What’s going on ere” a voice said.
Farmer Jones grabbed little Danny
And he shook him so hard, Danny cried.
“Attack my sheep would you” he bellowed
“Its jail for you, the judge can decide”.
The news soon reached me (I’m Alice)
It reached my mum and dad too
“Dad they’ve locked him in jail” I said
What are we going to do”?
“Calm down” said dad “we need cool heads
And the best lawyer that we can afford”
So he got on the phone and called one
By the name of Mr. Sideboard.
Then they drove into town to see Danny
In the jail of the magistrates courts
He lay there covered in bandages
Mother said “By gum, he looks out of sorts”
The jailor let Alice go into the cell
When he saw her, he wagged his tail
Alice told him “Don’t worry
Our lawyer is not going to fail”.
Next day it were in the papers
With a picture of Danny too
Mad dog kills sheep were the headline
Full story will be on page two.
They entered the office of Mr. Sideboard
He had carpets would you believe
“Now then Mr. Entwistle (that’s our surname)
What’s to do I cannot conceive!”
“Your Danny is obviously guilty
He had blood on his mouth and paws
I shall plead with judge for mercy
But I doubt if we’ll get it of course”.
“There’s only one possible sentence
In cases like this I’m afraid
That’s for Danny to be hung till he’s dead
You best be sorting his grave”.
Then summat append that were quite amazing
My dad stood up strong and tall
“Mr. Sideboard, our Danny is Innocent
And you sir know bugger all.”
We marched right out of the office
And I stuck me tongue out at him
My dad shouted “we’ll defend Danny
And if you send us a bill, it’ll go in the bin”.
The Judge looked over his glasses
“Next case” he quickly did say
The Usher called “Bring Danny Entwisle
He’s vicious so keep well away.”
Danny were to small for the dock
So a policeman held him up high
The policeman looked at Danny
Danny licked him right in one eye.
The first witness were farmer Jones
And he said just what he saw
And than they asked me dad
If he wanted to say any more.
Me father stood up real proud like
And he said “This case is most grave
For an innocent dog is before you”
Then he gave our Dan a quick wave.
“I have statements from hundreds of people
Saying Danny has a fine temperament
One of them from Danny’s vet
Which he most kindly sent”.
But the Judge put his black cap on
“You’re a vicious killer” he said
“You’ll be taken from here in the morning
And hung by your neck until dead”.
“I cried NO please save my Danny”
My father pleaded as well
Our Danny just let out a whimper
As they took him back to his cell.
Just then the court door burst open
It were Jimmy our dustman with red face
“Stop stop” he shouted real loud like
“I’ve new evidence in this terrible case”.
The judge thought it mighty irregular
But he swore the Dustman in
He told of the morning in question
And how he’d been emptying a bin.
He had seen the two dogs in question
And the terrible deed they had done
How Danny had fought hard to stop them
And stop them he did by gum.
The Judge banged his gavel quite loudly
And shouted “This case is dismissed”
The crowd went wild with cheering
We jumped up and down and kissed.
Now Danny is back home, a hero
Asleep in our yard once more
Surrounded by bones from well wishers
And cards on his kennel door.
Dr Fogg
Copyright ©2009. HW Harborne
Lita