Saffron
Experienced Member
Daughter of Ecanus
Posts: 365
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Post by Saffron on May 24, 2009 20:57:23 GMT -5
Children in tide pools with butterfly nets Shy lovers hiding in private inlets Seabirds squeal, then run from the tide Air tubes and surfboards go for a ride
Shovels with buckets adorn the sand Crowds form for a dolphin, then slowly disband The wind blows up towels and knocks down chairs Tanning oil and sea spray waft through the air
A waist-deep fisherman has a sunburned back A book-reader slowly succumbs to a nap Blue-crabs square off and engage in a duel A sand-buried teen forgets that she's cool
An ice-chest holds cheese, cold drinks, grapes Sea-oats, & driftwood dot the landscape Balls, kites, Frisbees all fight for the sky A mother gives smooches to her little wet guy
Waves crash to shore, then quickly retreat Gulls drop in for a chat or a treat An inner-tube floats till it's just a speck A day at the beach is as good as it gets
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Post by polonius on May 24, 2009 21:13:01 GMT -5
A very convivial picture of a summer holiday at the beach, and as the title makes clear, Penny, the high point of human life in all its forms, the sort of ordinariness that makes life worth living and loving.
Have an EXALT biscuit.
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Post by ARTHUR KELLY on May 25, 2009 2:31:54 GMT -5
*exalt* what a beautiful picture so well written and captured, and so easily read with a nice rhythm and an excellent rhyme, You really ticked all the boxes for me with this one M'lady - very much enjoyed
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fairqueen
Apprentice Member
Colored Pencil Drawing by Fairqueen
Posts: 233
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Post by fairqueen on May 25, 2009 4:48:45 GMT -5
Love this one, my friend!!!! Some people write words...and they are just words. You write words and they become vivid pictures in my mind. I feel like I've spent a day at the beach...and I want to go again and again.
Love Jan
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Post by tryeager on Jun 7, 2009 15:04:26 GMT -5
The language and description is great. The rhythm seems to break at times, but a great poem over all.
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Jim
Apprentice Member
Posts: 164
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Post by Jim on Jun 12, 2009 16:03:35 GMT -5
Hi Lady B, your descriptions are so vivid. I really love that third stanza especially. though I'm not a beach-goer, I relate to the message. truly it is the little things in life! exalt dear poet.
peace
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