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Post by Jamie~poetshare.forumotion.com on Apr 13, 2009 11:42:35 GMT -5
Weep, Muse, and shed summation-- Betrayed by lesser station, Left swimming in frustration: Keep my heart nestled, and weep.
Flail, rage in ways most unkind, 'Til justified response find, And then, with your path refined: Keep my mind able, and deep.
Strike, Muse, make the mountains shake, Stir sufficient vengeance, quake Until Midnight's tears we slake: Keep me rapt in your passion.
Breathe, exhale dawn triumphant, Rise, and with calmer voice, vent, Loose mighty visions, bent On my growth and construction.
And forgive, Muse. Future calls, Not Intent to echo halls Of deaf minds--and vengeance palls: Dispatch these bold distractions.
But first, Muse, for loss must steep, Tears as salve for souls' scars deep, Held soft in memory's keep: Tomorrow we write. Now weep.
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Post by Artemis on Apr 15, 2009 9:25:45 GMT -5
Jamie this is astounding! Wonderful and imaginitive vocabulary, depth and style to this work, I love it! Cookie in your jar for this unique and refreshing write, too many fav lines I'm afraid ... just loved it all, sincerely, Artemis xx
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fairqueen
Apprentice Member
Colored Pencil Drawing by Fairqueen
Posts: 233
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Post by fairqueen on Apr 15, 2009 18:30:20 GMT -5
I don't think your Muse has left, my friend. Not with the lines you write in this poem. I feel like a broken record, but another great job! I'd like MY Muse to meet YOUR muse..maybe something would rub off! Janet
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Post by Harklight on Apr 20, 2009 17:46:59 GMT -5
If your muse had gone awol, Jamie, it could wander in here. I enjoyed the rolling lines and sustained complex rhyme scheme. As it's appropriate to many of us, I would have guessed your last word to be "sleep" *grins. H x
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Post by Jamie~poetshare.forumotion.com on Apr 20, 2009 17:54:52 GMT -5
Thank you all so much, I really appreciate it. Harklight, she had to weep first . . .and then move on-- shed summation and get over it all. I wrote this when Penny left.
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Post by Harklight on Apr 20, 2009 18:01:26 GMT -5
I only hinted at that , but she could wander in here, anytime to a very warm welcome. and now I feel sappy ... H xx
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Post by gentlewind ~~(Serenity) on Apr 23, 2009 9:15:39 GMT -5
Wow,, this is excellent Jamie... I just love your work.. Maybe you can rub some of you talent my way I love this part But first, Muse, for loss must steep, Tears as salve for souls' scars deep, Held soft in memory's keep: Tomorrow we write. Now weep. Thank you for sharing this with us.... You are well penned hugs Gentlewind
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Ebonfire
Experienced Member
[ss:Chocolate]
Posts: 326
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Post by Ebonfire on Apr 23, 2009 17:07:16 GMT -5
Chiming in to say this was well written Jamie and you did use beautiful language. Projected great imagery too, your muse weeping gives us ideas about our own.
Ebonfire
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