Distance (is more than just miles..)

[NewMan™]

Distance
(is more than just miles..)


The distance has always been there, between you and I
I lived 10 miles from you, under a different sky
You created a new world and left me alone in mine
Between us there exists an invisible line..


1970

Back then you didn't need another mouth to feed
With five kids before me, you had a full house indeed
A house that would fall apart later on that year
One day a busy swing-set would just disappear..

The state had stepped in, I was only two
They took us away from both Mom and you
Your marriage didn't last, you soon divorced
No one was allowed to see us, this the state enforced..

Soon you re-married, you found love with your new wife
You got your act together, picked up the pieces of life
You slowly got your kids back, by then I was five
You also had another child, unfortunately, he didn't survive..

By now Mom had also re-married, she wanted us too
So you packed away my suit-case, you bid me adieu
With another baby on the way, you needed more space
I moved in with Mom into her new place..

Mom's house was also crowed, no room for me there
In less than two years, I wound up again in foster care
While your new marriage had failed, this time the stumbling block
The baby I had moved out for, couldn't see, talk or walk..


1975

This baby was named Shawn, he was full of laughter and charm
He was sent to be live with his mothers parents on their farm
Although only my half-brother, he was still close enough kin
For foster care to decide this was the best place to put me in..

Shawn's family hated you with a passion, why? I've not a clue
They never once had anything to say good in regards to you
They pointed out, you would never visit Shawn, even on his birthday
"It's not like" they would always remind me, "he lives that far away.."

I was taught to feel guilty when someone said your name
For the next nine years I learned how to play the blame game
This is how we grew distant while only living a few miles apart
Then I heard you had disowned me.. that news broke my heart..



2012

Years have past, I moved away.. living on my own
I keep a thousand miles between my past, I'm in my own time zone
I'm torn about how to feel about you.. for Shawn needed you there
I can still hear it in my head... "Your father doesn't even care.."

Yet now I can see your side, Shawn's family was to much
Anything you would do would upset them at the slightest touch
You knew they taught me to hate you, it showed in my eyes
So we spent many more years living under different skies..

However this year a promise, my sisters last desire
For you and I to put away our past and try to acquire
An understanding of each other, perhaps one day, who knows
A father/son relationship that day by day grows..

I have to learn to forgive, to let my anger die
It's happening very slowly, as each day passes by
It started on facebook, you requested to be my friend
Even if I can't forget our past I can at least learn to pretend..


Tomorrow

So even if I never said it, I hope that you know
The future is ours to create, the past.. a long time ago
The distance that was between us is slowly fading away
This is the first time ever I can wish you a Happy Father's Day..

© ₂₀₁₂