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Post by apocalypticjay on May 13, 2009 8:45:49 GMT -5
 The warm silence of silver smiles Like bullets for my senses Tragic how the river flows No hero for it's storms In time I'll be a painter Painting the world black Alive for an indifferent red morning With a meaningless grin to save the world We'll hold on with all we have To this floating fantasy of magnitude Hanging by a single thread of ribbon Born to keep us breathing, in stillness Tender is the taste of sky Yet with no fear or feeling Please bring me your flower or fire Now teach me how to stop dreaming |
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Post by Artemis on May 13, 2009 9:22:56 GMT -5
Exalt. This is what I love about your work Jay. So many different styles you have, each magnificent and each original. The imagery you paint is like no other I have read, you are different and I love your work so much. I know when I see a new piece from you that I will love it. I hope you're not suffereing with insomnia ... Although I adored the whole piece the second and fourth stanzas were my favourite ... such imagination and vocabulary ... One of my most favourite poets I have to say. Much love, K xxxx  |
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Post by Harklight on May 14, 2009 13:45:18 GMT -5
The intro stanza creates strong images for me, Jay: "Like bullets for my senses" rings familiar. They're the ones that rouse entirely from warm silence, silver smiles and flowing rivers preventing sleep. Strong imagination and good word choices in this write. Start painting ~ pleeease! "floating fantasy of magnitude" sounds ideal. If I start dreaming at least I'd know some sleep. Chronic insomniac ~ H x
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Jim
Apprentice Member
Posts: 164
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Post by Jim on May 16, 2009 9:07:29 GMT -5
I can't really add more to what's been said above. I rarely suffer from insomnia but I do awake weary from dreaming. almost like living two lives that sometimes overlap, which is how i interpret this piece. your word choices and phrasing are highly appealing. exalt
peace
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Post by polonius on May 28, 2009 0:04:40 GMT -5
Dreaming can inspire a plague of disappointments. But without hope that makes dreams there would just be despair, that is more terrible than disapointed dreams.
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