Post by Jamie~poetshare.forumotion.com on Dec 18, 2009 9:04:14 GMT -5
I'd waited for the old man since the accident last year
As vengeance festered in this heart of mine,
Determined I would teach him to be careful with those deer--
Running over gramma was a crime.
Christmas eve arrived and I had feigned a sleeping pose
Waiting for the fat man and his sleigh,
Underneath the covers sweating in my winter clothes,
To ensure this would be his last day.
On the roof I heard a "thump" and crept out of my room
Peering downstairs as old Santa sneaks.
As he put the presents out, up to the roof I zoomed
Carrots in my hand for reindeer treats.
Loosening the harnesses that hitched them to the sleigh,
I figured two miles up the deer'd break loose
Then he'd fall straight downward, there'd be no more "Dash Away"
I was about to cook Santa's goose
I felt a tinge or remorse as I thought of all the kids,
Should I give the old man a reprieve?
Then I remembered watching gramma dragged under those skids--
Still, I couldn't ruin Christmas Eve.
So I tightened up the cinches quickly as I could,
When I heard his "Ho-Ho" from behind,
"Knew you couldn't do it. See, it says right here's you're good."
He pointed to his list, and looked so kind.
"I know why you're here, my boy, believe me: I've been framed,"
Santa said while getting in the sleigh.
"Ride with me this Christmas eve, I'll tell you who's to blame"
I got in and we up'd and away.
"Notice there's a reindeer who is not up front tonight?
Rudolph's off the team for drunken driving.
Passed out over Memphis last year six miles up mid-flight,
Christmas ruined by a Hare conniving."
"Please don't blame ol' Rudy, lad, I saw him acting funny
And I should've acted on my hunch.
Jealousy's an ugly word, but blame the Easter Bunny--
He's the one who spiked the Reindeer's' punch!"
Everything explained to me, I thanked him for the ride,
And for the presents he'd to children bring.
Now I've got the story straight, I've got some traps to hide--
Easter doesn't come until the spring.
As vengeance festered in this heart of mine,
Determined I would teach him to be careful with those deer--
Running over gramma was a crime.
Christmas eve arrived and I had feigned a sleeping pose
Waiting for the fat man and his sleigh,
Underneath the covers sweating in my winter clothes,
To ensure this would be his last day.
On the roof I heard a "thump" and crept out of my room
Peering downstairs as old Santa sneaks.
As he put the presents out, up to the roof I zoomed
Carrots in my hand for reindeer treats.
Loosening the harnesses that hitched them to the sleigh,
I figured two miles up the deer'd break loose
Then he'd fall straight downward, there'd be no more "Dash Away"
I was about to cook Santa's goose
I felt a tinge or remorse as I thought of all the kids,
Should I give the old man a reprieve?
Then I remembered watching gramma dragged under those skids--
Still, I couldn't ruin Christmas Eve.
So I tightened up the cinches quickly as I could,
When I heard his "Ho-Ho" from behind,
"Knew you couldn't do it. See, it says right here's you're good."
He pointed to his list, and looked so kind.
"I know why you're here, my boy, believe me: I've been framed,"
Santa said while getting in the sleigh.
"Ride with me this Christmas eve, I'll tell you who's to blame"
I got in and we up'd and away.
"Notice there's a reindeer who is not up front tonight?
Rudolph's off the team for drunken driving.
Passed out over Memphis last year six miles up mid-flight,
Christmas ruined by a Hare conniving."
"Please don't blame ol' Rudy, lad, I saw him acting funny
And I should've acted on my hunch.
Jealousy's an ugly word, but blame the Easter Bunny--
He's the one who spiked the Reindeer's' punch!"
Everything explained to me, I thanked him for the ride,
And for the presents he'd to children bring.
Now I've got the story straight, I've got some traps to hide--
Easter doesn't come until the spring.
